How can I do Mediation if I am not a skilled negotiator?

When people find themselves in a dispute, they would love to imagine themselves being skilled to negotiate;; or make an unassailable argument; or win the battle of logic; or make a case that would win over any opponent.  

Unfortunately most of these romantic ideas remain exactly that - just ideas. When it comes to negotiating most of us probably feel like we’re not very competent. Perhaps you’ve tried to bargain down the price of something you’re trying to buy? Or perhaps you’ve been overseas and maybe done some bartering with a shop owner? But when it comes to resolving a dispute in the workplace or within your family or with the next-door neighbour – sometimes things can get really sticky, and really difficult. Maybe you’re thinking that you’re not a really good negotiator and so you don’t have the confidence to go and talk to someone about an issue that’s really quite important. 

This is where the mediator steps in. The mediator is not so much an expert negotiator, but the mediator is a person who can enable two parties to have a structured, helpful and effective dialogue. Mediation only works when both parties are willing.

The mediator creates an environment where both parties can respectfully state their interests and what has happened in the past until now. Also, the mediator creates that environment where people can listen actively to each other and consider the other persons point of view.

There can be sometimes be difficult moments, but this is the skill of the mediator - to create a safe and respectful environment so that two parties can work their way to agreement. So you don’t need to be a great negotiator, you just need to seek that opportunity to let a mediator help you come together with the party that you are in dispute with. We can assist you with understanding if a mediation is right for you - use this FREE diagnostic here.